Sunday, 24 March 2013

Plenty of Dins...

So this is why Internet dating hasn't worked for us.... 

Hayley and Amy

Sunday, 17 March 2013

Hayley's February date

My longest standing non-celebrity crush has got to be the postman at work.
He is the ultimate silver fox. DILF. So I couldn't believe my luck when he asked me out.

He did the old gentlemanly thing of picking me up - no not in his red van.
He had flowers, took me to a really classy restaurant where we had good food, good wine and good banter. He would not let me pay a penny. He dropped me home and did not try and get in my pants.

And then I woke up.

Shock there was no February date. Better luck for March ay - only 14 days left. Shit, better start inboxing.


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Amy's February Date

Well they do say absence makes the heart grow fonder... sorry we've been slack. Basically, shortly after the below date, I was briefly seeing someone. He then told me he was going to work a season in Ibiza this summer. That old chestnut ;) 

Aaaaanyway, Mr February arranged to meet me for a hot chocolate in a little village pub. This makes me more nervous than a boozy night out, not sure why. Probably because I can't blame any 'Amy-isms' on being pissed. 
I got there a bit early so waited for him in the car like a cool person, and he rocked up in a dad-car.

Mr February is very tall, and very good looking. He looks a lot like Steve Jones,  this is good, very good. He's a lot better looking than his brother, who I have also dated but anyway, moving on :/
 Despite me thinking that I'd played it cool, he tells me that he'd seen me waiting in my car. Fuck. 

We had about 3 hours of chit chat over two hot chocolates (steady on), and then I decide to call it a night at the late hour of 9 o clock. 
Mr February is really good looking, kind, sweet and funny. But I don't fancy him. Brilliant. 

After a facebook stalking sesh, and bumping into him on a night out, I discover why I don't fancy him. His mouth is a funny shape when he talks. And he wears bootleg jeans. 

Conversation with my two best friends tonight: 
"Come on Amy, you always moan about not finding a nice guy"
"Yeah, one day you might look at him and realise that his cat bum mouth is one of the things you love about him"

Sorry girls.